Happy Hoe-lidays!

Ho! Ho! Hoe! Happy Hoe-lidays!

Uh-oh, looks like Santa got ahold of some alcoholic egg nog again. So much for the 12 step program….. again.

But seriously though, the holidays are a dangerous time of year for every man, woman, and child! Horrible weather, money spent on toys instead of tires, drunk driving increases, and worst of all, holiday shopping.

What? You think I’m kidding? Need I remind you of this little fella?

Yes, this little red bastard. Elmo. I remember watching the news with my parents and seeing the mobs stampede through the stores for a little red doll that giggled……… I’m sorry what? People literally beat other human beings into bloody pulps for this doll. How about you do something in your child’s life that will actually benefit them and show them that you truly love them. Not get your ass sent to jail for fighting someone for a doll to give them on Christmas.

Apparently Police pepper sprayed some customers fighting to get into a mall in Seattle. Great job in my opinion. This is a lot different than macing some college students sitting down in a peaceful protest. These people were fighting over line positions and who got into the mall first. They bent a door off of its hinges! You want to fight, yell, shove someone, make a confrontation in public, or just in general bring violence into a public setting. I think you deserve a bit of mace in the face. Three times fast, what?

Not to mention the people at Walmart, not to be confused with people of walmart, fighting over a $2 waffle maker. A TWO DOLLAR WAFFLE MAKER! Now, that’s not in all caps to stress the fact that it’s only two dollars! But to stress the fact that it’s a WAFFLE MAKER! There is no reason to freak out over a waffle maker. You know who they’re probably buying that waffle maker for. A college student or someone who just moved out. That’s who you buy a waffle maker. You know who actually makes waffles to eat as a meal. Not a college student, they eat Eggo waffles if they want a waffle. So basically grandma caught an elbow to the face on Black Friday grabbing you a $2 waffle maker that you’ll probably hold onto for a year and then when it comes time to move out of the dorms at the end of the semester, you’re going to be cleaning out the kitchen and realize you never used that random waffle maker in the kitchen, not sure whose it is, so you leave it and the maintenance people throw it away.

At least the lady who pepper sprayed about 20 people in Porter Ranch did it for something most college students won’t leave behind. Their Xbox. Apparently the Xboxes were on sale, people once again start freaking out like a bunch of animals for some reason and begin to rip the plastic doors off the case that the gaming consoles boxes are held. So some random lady pulls out her pepper spray and decides the crowd needs something else to get more adrenaline flowing and to cause more people to panic and freak out. Ahhhhh, the lack of common sense in human beings. Aren’t we supposed to become smarter or more sophisticated? Or is it more that a select few have become smart enough to carry the rest of society allowing the humans that would naturally die off to thrive in society, and pepper spray people in Walmart on Black Friday……..

Like I said, gotta love the holidays ;D

I hope you all were safe in your shopping for your loved ones, I also hope that none of you took what should have been a happy act of love in purchasing gifts for your loved ones and escalated it into a negative experience over an object. People are more important than plastic and batteries.

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