Shipping Out

Whether it’s by ship, plane, train, or automobile, shipping out is the term generally used in reference to the military when they send you somewhere. Or at least that’s what I say and I’ve heard a lot of other people say.

I like to think that it’s because we used to send our infantry troops overseas on ships, so the term “shipping out” stuck and not for the more depressing idea that once enlisted that you essentially become a logistical unit, losing identity but gaining function. Reduced to an item/number being “shipped out”.

This guy looks ready…. errrrrr, guy? I don’t know, I can’t tell. But ready enough, already in the box, ready to ship, and the combat boots too!

Let me say this first, I’m in no way hating on the military or the men and women serving. I respect them very much, and understand the endeavors they go through to ensure the safety of our country. If you can read what I’m writing, thank a teacher. If you can read it in English, thank a veteran….. well, unless you’re in another country and reading this in English, props for learning English! Unless it’s your countries main language, then… well, I don’t know.

Anyways, where I was originally going with this. Shipping out, yes, here’s the un glorified vision I have of the military.

It’s a prison you want to be in.

Hold on, wait a minute, I know they seem very contrasting at first thought. Let me explain a bit.

First the real differences, how you end up there, what you wear, the pay, and where you live.

In the prison system you end up there because ย you fucked up in society, and you need to “pay” for the crimes you committed, or the more politically correct term, you must be rehabilitated! To join the military, you willingly sign away your life to them. Unless you get that deal in court, jail or the military. Then I guess technically you willingly sign up…. I’m sure most people who get offered that don’t want either one.

Prison attire! Really it varies from prison system to prison system, state to state, but most prison/jail outfits are orange or blue or whatever. They pretty blatantly put some sort of department of corrections logo on them CDC(California Department of Corrections) and so on and so forth. But everyone gets issued the same clothes, to identify them as prisoners. Some states go so far as to attempt to mentally and emotionally break down the prisoners using pink garments as the department of corrections issued clothing.

What, you thought I was kidding?! No way man, Arizona has some of the toughest prisons and jails. The warden or whomever that guy is, can’t remember his name or who he is, and I’m too lazy to look it up ๐Ÿ˜€ holding up the pink ย underwear the inmates are required to wear.

Sheriff Joe Arpaio holding Prisoners Pink Underwear

Yet in the military they do a somewhat similar thing….. but still different. Everyone gets issued the same clothes, only differing for rank and other insignias to show that you’re dick is just a bit bigger than the other guys ;D

Dammmmmnnnnnnn!!!!!!!!!!!! His dick is FOUR stars BIG! Shit has gotta be huge…. especially with the look that guy has got on his face ๐Ÿ˜€ Looks like it hurts just standing there, all that extra weight pulling his hips forward. His lower back has gotta be killing him.

Anyways, sooooo, different ways to get in, different looks in the uniforms, and probably the biggest difference, the pay.

Yep, some prisoners can get jobs and actually make money in prison. Don’t get too excited, they don’t make that much. The prisoners, I’m talking about the prisoners. I’ve heard of them making different amounts, but nothing substantial. Especially when you think about the time frame they’ve been in there and how much money they make. “Yay! Finally finished that 10 yr. stretch, how much money did I make? $500?! Hell yeah! Getting drunk tonight!” Almost sounds like some of my buddies in the military… “Hell Yeah! Getting drunk tonight!” and then in the military you make a bit more, nothing too crazy. Like most jobs, more education and experience and qualifications, more zeros at the end.

It’s prison, obviously you can’t petition to live outside the prison and have the department of corrections give you some money for rent. Defeats the whole point of being in prison.

When I was going through the differenced I started to think more about how similar the two systems really are.

Both are extremely structured, with a system you MUST FOLLOW! Or else….. insert generic prison/military punishment. Sometimes the or else means prison/jail in the military and sometimes the or else in jail/prison means more jail/prison time.

Times to eat, times to sleep, time for yourself, time to work. It’s all decided by someone else who is higher up than you in the pecking order, a superior officer, or the guard or warden.

and both seem equally willing to fuck you in the ass, metaphorically or literally.

The food! In both systems you have the option to eat for free, or pay a bit extra for the fun stuff and the things you want. But really, they look the same.

Oh wait, you get a fork in the military.

Housing, now I said they’re different, but really not that different. So you can walk in and out of your room on base whenever you want, there’s a prison that does that for their non-violent sexual offenders wing. Yep, they get a key to their cell and can lock it and unlock it as they please and leave it when they want during the day.

Lets go back to Arizona real quick. That same prison that has the prisoners wearing pink underwear, they’ve also got some of their inmates living outside. Yep, outside, in tents.

I really can’t feel that bad for them though, doesn’t look much different from what our soldier in Iraq are going through.

Looks like the same crowded conditions for both. Similar weather too. Hot during the day, cold at night. Snows in both places. Shitty living situations for both.

Man, this blog post is all over the place! lol Really should have done a couple of drafts of this one ๐Ÿ˜€

Ok, the last real difference. If you make it in to prison, it fucks up your life pretty good. Almost impossible to get a job and get back on your feet. There is some potential for the same in the military, a DIShonorable discharge.

I’m pretty sure there’s three ways of standing to leave the military. An honorable discharge, hooray you did everything you were supposed to, didn’t fuck up too bad, and lived! An other than honorable discharge, discharged for medical reasons, all sorts of stuff. A dishonorable discharge, congratulations, you fucked up so bad the military has deemed you a dishonorable person. Try getting a job that does background checks when you have a dishonorable discharge.

Now, I’m not on probation or parole or anything like that, but I’m pretty sure you have to state on applications whether you are a felon and what not. Not sure if you have to state whether you got a dishonorable discharge. Either way, it’s not going to be easy to hide that from people.

Sooooooooo, that’s the random thought that was going through my head when I decided to start this blog post ๐Ÿ˜€ I hope you guys all enjoyed this random as all hell blog post, and were able to follow my random thought process.

Once again I would like to thank those that are veterans, currently enlisted, or in the process of enlisting. You’re putting yourself through some shit, or already did, for our country, and our way of life. I appreciate your strength to endeavor a system I just compared to our prison system, which isn’t thought too highly of. This wasn’t meant to disrespect or dishonor any branches of the armed services, but another reason to respect them. They willingly put themselves into a “prison” system.

I’m always open to constructive criticism and differing view points!

Not quite a bunch of naked men sucking each others dicks in fatigues….

but it is a realistic photo of a bunch of shirtless guys in the armed services, so I think it’s even better ;D

Hope you all enjoy, and until next time when I’m sure I’ll be doing a post about something naked ;D

Sammy

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2 Responses to Shipping Out

  1. Khristopher says:

    Great post! Very thought provoking.
    Does a dishonorable discharge go on your Social Security? So when you apply for a job, and an employer runs it, they see your past history, including what happened in the military? Seems kind of flawed to me. However, if you commit a crime in the military, I don’t know if you get a dishonorable discharge, or if you go to jail. I assume jail, and does that mean you get a dishonorable discharge?
    Anyway, I’m rambling!

    PS: You should have 4 stars ๐Ÿ˜‰

  2. Dino says:

    You must be a fun drunk to talk to with the stream of consciousness flowing out of you! ๐Ÿ™‚

    But seriously you make a valid comparison of the two. To me it seems like prisoners are treated well and fairly by a human rights standpoint, and people in the military sacrifice a lot of themselves for the country. They do what they have to do in order to be efficient and effective. Perhaps a prison like lifestyle is efficient and effective especially since command and orders are crucial to success.

    Thanks for the post and to end it on a not so serious note

    PENIS!!!!!

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